Summit is on the Garwood line; I don’t know why I need to double check every time. Summit is always on the Garwood line. Summit will always be on the Garwood line.
November 9, 2017: Summit is on the Garwood line, just like I thought. The train is on track 5. It’s not too crowded today; probably because it’s a Sunday. Thanksgiving is soon. Shit, I need to buy a neon pink poster for my AP Environmental Science class tomorrow. The conductor checks my ticket. I wonder why they always look so angry. Fuck, the pink poster. Walgreens closes at 9, the train gets into Summit at 8:47pm. I text Dad, “I need a poster for school tomorrow, can you drive me to Walgreens?” He replies, moments later, “Sure.” He loves to pronounce “Sure,” like “Shore.” I have never asked why. That’s not what I should be worried about. The train gets in at 8:46pm. We make it to Walgreens with time to spare. I get an A on the project. Dad buys me ice cream to celebrate.
March 5, 2018: Summit is on the Garwood line, just like I thought. The train is on track 9. I was almost late. I fucking hate the train. The texture of the seats pisses me off. I sit next to this old woman, who keeps staring at me. The train gets into Summit at 11:52pm. Dad texts, “Here” at 11:30pm. I feel bad that he needs to stay up so late to pick me up from the train. We’re going to Gammy’s house tomorrow. When I enter the car, he smiles at me. He turns up the Bruce Springsteen song on the radio. He doesn’t yawn once.
June 28, 2018: Summit is on the Garwood line, just like I thought. The train is on track 10. I am with Annabel today. I can’t believe we finished high school. We eat the last bit of our ice cream, as the train pulls out of Penn Station. Annabel tells me that there is chocolate on my face and we laugh. The train gets into Summit at 7:56pm. We can’t find Dad’s car. He didn’t text. After 15 minutes, he pulls up to Summit station. His phone had died and the car needed gas; but he laughed it off.
December 2, 2018: Summit is on the Garwood line, just like I thought. The train is on track 3. It was surprisingly warm out today. The Rockefeller Center tree was beautiful. The train gets into Summit at 5:55pm. Dad texts, “Hustle! I am parked illegally.” I run to the car. Our Christmas tree is strapped on top and Dad is wearing a new flannel.
April 9, 2019: Summit is on the Garwood line, just like I thought. The train is on track 6. I was visiting Aunt Cat. We had fantastic Thai food and spotted a celebrity at the restaurant. Cat knew who the person was, I didn’t. The train gets into Summit at 6:33pm. Dad has his high beams on. He doesn’t know who the person was either. Maybe everyone defines “celebrity” differently.
May 29, 2019: Summit is on the Garwood line, just like I thought. The train is on track 1. The day, and the train ride, was uneventful. The train gets into Summit at 1:22pm. Dad is in a red rental car today. We drive home with the windows open. It’s the perfect day. He brought me a slice of pizza. He always gets me one slice and himself two. He always offers me his second. I almost forgot that it’s his birthday.
October 21, 2019: Summit is on the Garwood line, just like I thought. The train is on track 3. I don’t have enough money for my ticket today, and the nice lady in front of me gives me her spare change. I am with Isabelle and Alicia today. We’re going to Rose’s party. It’s a miracle when I have two plans in one day. I am not a popular person. The train gets into Summit at 6:16pm. Dad texts, “Here. Loves.” I have never met someone that says the word, “Love” as much as he does. He drops us off at Rose’s. I wonder if he has plans tonight, but I know the answer is no. I don’t say a word.
July 6, 2020: Summit is on the Garwood line, just like I thought. The train is on track 7. Kylie and I went to Central Park today. I was worried about COVID. The world sucks. The train gets into Summit at 8:19pm. Kylie is chewing gum. So am I. I am chewing cinnamon gum. She’s chewing bubble gum. I open the car door. Dad is chewing gum too. He’s a loud chewer.
September 8, 2021: Summit is on the Garwood line, just like I thought. The train is on track 5. The train gets into Summit at 7:55pm. Dad picks me up, farther away than usual. He tries to make conversation. I turn away. I am in a bad mood and don’t want to talk to him.
December 7, 2021: Summit is on the Garwood line, just like I thought. The train is on track 8. My bag is heavy and a cute baby is sitting next to me. I wonder where everyone is going. I wonder who everyone is. I wonder why I even had to buy a ticket. I am alone. It’s December, but it still feels too dark. I don’t like the shirt I am wearing. My head hurts. I want a coffee. I text Mom that I want a coffee, she says she’ll have it when she picks me up. The train gets into Summit at 7:18pm. This is usually a perfect time to get home from New York City. A 7:18pm arrival time usually means that I had a great day in the city, but am still making it home for dinner. I’d love to have dinner in the city, but it's too expensive. My job doesn’t pay very much.
I wonder if 7:18pm means it’s too late. Mom picks me up. The coffee is shitty. I told her to get me a latte. I hate regular coffee, but I don’t complain. The drive to the hospital is short. I enter a dark room. It’s time to say goodbye.
I think of a train on the Garwood line. Only this time, it’s headed away from Summit. I’d like to be the one to pick him up from the train, but for once, I have no idea where it’s going.
He deserved so much better than the Garwood line.