The 5 kids you'll meet in class

Posted by Katie Peverada The Hand-Raiser: This is the girl or boy who raises their hand to answer every question asked - or not asked. Look, I understand that some people retain more of the reading than I do, and therefore they know more answers or can offer more input. However, there is no way that someone can know the answer to every single question every single class - unless they're Ken Jennings. Put your hand down and stop making the rest of us look stupid.

The Pretentious One: These kids are mostly found in the Humanities and use big words. As a result I don't expect science majors to have that many run-ins with them, as science majors use words the average student doesn't understand anyways. But I digress. Dear Pretentious Student, stop speaking with terms that you clearly used Theseauraus.com to look up before class and talk like a normal college student. Also, stop correcting or saying "Ahh...well actually." Oh really? You disagree? I don't care if you disagree. In fact, I welcome it. I do, however, care that you clearly think you're better than everyone else in the class. Frankly, nobody cares what you have to say.

The One Who Dresses Obnoxiously: This is probably the wrong venue for this, but I think it applies to kids in class that I hate because you're distracting us. You're distracting with your god-damn clothes. You honestly have to TRY that hard to dress that badly. Okay, I know I'm not the next Eleanor Waldorff (if I had a nickel for every time someone has made fun of my sailboat oxford, I could buy another sailboat oxford), but I know enough about fashion to know that you shouldn't look like that. Instead of learning, I'm spending half of the class trying to figure out why you're wearing two pairs of tights, rain boots, a turtle neck, and a nineties wind-breaker that isn't even weird enough to be weird-cool. Dress normally.

The Texter: I'll be honest. I've texted in class before, but I think everyone has at some point (I actually don't even use my phone as of late, but that's part of my mid-life crisis you don't care about). I'm talking about the girl/boy that has their phone on their desk "hidden" underneath their "notebook." You're clearly not taking notes. You're texting. I want to know, though, what it is that could be so important that you have to text for fifty-five minutes straight. It's rather rude.

The Jerk(s): Usually, there are two or three kids that have signed up to take the class together. They sit in the back row. They dump on the professor for what they're wearing. They make fun of a kid who doesn't know the answer when called upon. They make themselves look like huge donkeys. They claim they "didn't see the homework assignment" or that they "thought it was due tomorrow." Really? You thought it was due on a day we didn't have class?