When it comes to hook ups, take rumors with a grain of salt: What would C. do?

Posted by C.

There's something so unnerving about hooking up with someone and then having an awkward interaction, or having them just totally ignoring you.

If you forget a name, don't worry about it. Flash a friendly smile to acknowledge the person and move on—if you even remember who they are. If they ignore you, take that as a sign that they probably don't remember, or may think you don't. They also might think they did something stupid or were sloppy.

If you don't care that's great, move on. But if you find yourself stressing in your head send a closed mouth smile. It's friendly enough, but not overwhelming.

If you woke up Sunday morning wanting to scrape the embarrassment off your tongue, just know that life will go on.

Dear C.,

I've been hooking up with a guy for most of the semester, but only on his time. Whenever I want to, he has an excuse for why he can't. He seems like a nice guy, and from what I know from mutual friends, he usually treats girls really well. I want to believe that it's just a coincidence, but it's become a pattern. Should I talk to him about it? How can I bring up my concern without sounding too girlfriend-y?

—Always on Time

Dear Always on Time,

You'd be surprised at how many people are in your position and how many people want to be. It's always nice for a guy to call whenever he's thinking of you, but I totally understand the difficulty of it not being reciprocated.

First ask yourself, "Do I have self-control?" If yes, then next time he contacts you, make an excuse. Play his game. You don't always have to be available and this can be a good litmus test.

If he responds with hostility, stand your ground. Be cool and don't get testy.

Then it's up to you if you would like to contact him a week or two later, or you can really test him and see how long it takes him to make the next move. I know it's easy to trust mutual friends but some guys will act differently when they're trying to charm a girl. Listen to the opinions of mutual friends but take it with a grain of salt.

Most importantly, try and remain as detached as possible. I would refrain from being too up front in this case. Unless you want to treat the situation like a bad hip-hop duet and have public drama about it, just play it cool. Try to show him you have some power too. Don't always be on time — make him sweat.

—Hearts and Stars, C.

I am a nonbiased, nonjudgmental third party (because I love parties). My aim is to advise, not to direct. The real question is what will you do?

Email me at SkidWWCD@gmail.com with questions. Privacy is guaranteed. Advice can remain unpublished upon request.

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