Chip the Dog, controversial face of Cookie Crisp Cereal, selected as 2013 commencement speaker: April Fools Edition

Posted by Julia Martin

Students, professors and parents are outraged over the selection of Chip the Dog, the former face of Cookie Crisp Cereal, as the 2013 Commencement speaker. In a public statement sent out via e-mail on Thursday, members of the administration explained their decision:

"Chip has revolutionized the cereal industry. Cookies for breakfast?! The idea is both progressive and creative-two qualities we believe Skidmore students should embody. Chip was the face of Cookie Crisp Cereal for over a decade, and is one of the most successful dogs ever in the cutthroat and prejudice industry of cereal. Chip can also talk, a rare ability for dogs."

Students however, are enraged by the decision. Ben Harrison '14 said his anger stems from Chip's promotion of a poor product: "That little dog is always talking about how it tastes just like cookies and milk-that's the last time I listen to a dog! That stuff's nasty! It's confusing too, man, sometimes I'd forget what time it was because I'd be eating cookies in the morning, but usually I eat cookies at nighttime, so then I'd get confused about whether it was the morning or nighttime."

Parents have also cited Chip's multiple run-ins with the law as further reasoning why the dog shouldn't address the student body. Chip's most recent offense, public urination, landed him three nights in a NY state pound.

Chip explained that his recent arrests were products of his frustration over his unemployment, "In 2005 I was replaced by Chip the Wolf, because they told me I wasn't edgy anymore. His name isn't even Chip, it's Larry!" After taking a few moments to closely watch a nearby squirrel, Chip continued, "After I got laid off I got pretty koooOOOOOOOoooky, mainly because I was really lost. I needed some time to find myself again." Chip then chased after a squirrel before we could ask any further questions.  

Students reportedly plan to continue to protest the decision, while members of the administration expressed hopes that the student body would "throw them a bone."