Breaking up has never tasted this good

Posted by Mariel Kennedy

Ah, Valentine's Day, the only holiday yet to be corrupted and commercialized by the greeting card industry.

Having trouble thinking of what to get that special someone in your life? Fret not friends, lovers and nothings: clichés like flowers and heart-shaped candies will never go out of style.

 However, one can argue that some homemade gifts, like a mix- tape full of mushy songs or a romantic dinner for two, are more heartfelt and meaningful.

Growing up in a large, Italian family, I often show my love through cooking for friends and family.

Though I am far from a relationship expert, I have had a few boyfriends. I cooked for all of them and have yet to really disappoint any with my cooking.

However, after years of dating there is one recipe that I will never make for a boyfriend again.

In retrospect, my three most serious beaus had many similarities: all were around the same height,  all had blue eyes and dark hair, all played an instrument and all cheated on me.

Yes, I have been a spurned woman three times. But a strange similarity (and perhaps if I were less superstitious, simply a coincidence,) between these three exes is that I found out about the ‘other women' within a week or two of making them a particular cookie recipe.

This cookie recipe is extremely simple and delicious. In reality, they are just a type of chocolate chip cookie, a family recipe that I have played with over the years. My friends love it, my family loves it and it was always a big hit at bake sales and such.

But all three relationships involving this particular recipe have ended terribly.

The first time I made them for a boyfriend was sophomore year of high school. He was my first "real boyfriend" and was considerably older. So cliché. But I was "so in love"  and he did something note-worthy that escapes me at the moment, so I cooked for him to celebrate. The next week was Halloween, and at a party he hooked-up with several different girls. Heartbroken, I ended things then and there.

Next was junior year. I was, once again, completely infatuated with the guy I was dating. He was a friend of a friend and a drummer. He essentially lived at my house for a while. Then one day I cooked for him, cookies to be exact. The next week, I discovered he was seeing a friend of my brothers on the side. Done. Over. No thanks. I ended things.

The final time was for my senior year boyfriend. He was one of my best friends first and my most serious relationship to date. He loved when I cooked for him, so I cooked often. One day he wanted cookies, so I baked him a batch. Soon after, I saw him less and less. A mutual friend then told me that he was simultaneously dating a high school freshman, another girl in my grade and me. Ouch. I ended things.

Then got back with him, only to end things again when he, once again, started cheating.

As I stated before, this recipe is easy to make and a crowd pleaser. So with Valentine's Day right around the corner, make these cookies for your single friends as you listen to "Single Ladies," or some manly equivalent.

 Make them and eat the entire batch alone as you cry and curse your happily committed friends.

Make them if you are looking for an easy, guilt-free way to dump someone; your beau will most likely soon be revealed as untrue.

But I warn you, if you are happy in a relationship and want to stay together, do not make these cookies!

Bon appetite!

 


Ingredients:

1½ cups all purpose flour

1½ teaspoon baking soda

½ teaspoon salt

1 1/3 sticks unsalted butter,

     softened

½ cup sugar

½ cup firmly packed

    light brown sugar

1 large egg  

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 cup semisweet

    chocolate chips

1 cup craisins

Recipe:  

Preheat your oven 350 degrees. In a large bowl sift together the flour, baking soda and salt. In a separate large bowl, cream the butter with both types of sugars until smooth. Add the egg and vanilla extract to the creamed mixture and mix well. Add the flour mixture and beat thoroughly. Mix in the chocolate chips and craisins. On an ungreased cookie sheet, put small balls of dough about an inch or so apart. Bake for eight to ten minutes.